Monday, May 22, 2017

Marriage: 1952 to 1960

To date, Reflections essays have traced my family genealogy, my parents’ history and events and experiences of the early years of my life.  Stories presented in these essays have essentially been chronological, with some exceptions.  Describing your life story in a chronological manner is complicated because, in a sense, you have multiple parallel lives.  What is a parallel life?  Well, during any given time frame you have any number of parallel experiences that need a detailed explanation to fully describe the impact on your life.  This fact has been clearly demonstrated by the Reflections essays of the last three years.  As a consequence, racking my brain as to how to describe marriage experiences over a four decade time span, telling the story appeared to be an overwhelming task.  Overwhelming, because so many experiences and events are interwoven with many others.  Since there are numerous events that occurred during our marriage, my task becomes how to rationally tell our story, yet describe parallel experiences important to our overall story.  Thus, I believe it will require multiple essays to adequately describe our marriage experiences, with the essay number uncertain.  To be sure, my memory will be the major determinant on the necessary number of essays.

Certainly, our story is dependent upon my memory of events and when they transpired.  To be sure, there will be experiences forgotten, because the memory is buried too deep, or has been overwritten, or possibly corrupted in some way.  Perhaps you remember a couple of previous essays included brief glimpses into our initial years together.  The essay High School Years described the entrance of Beverly Ann Wilhite into my life and I into hers.  The essay College Years contains some of our early marriage experiences.  It has been about two years since posting the story of our meeting and over a year since publishing the account of our early marriage years.  As a refresher, those early events will be re-visited but with additional detail.  Since our initial meeting was a classic story of teenage comedy, it is best to begin the refresher at this “historic” moment in one’s life.

Unbeknownst to me at the time, Beverly Wilhite entered my life in the 1952 Spring Semester at Woodrow Wilson High School, although we did not actually meet until the Fall of 1952.  I was a Junior entering the Spring Semester in 1952.  After being cut from the Varsity baseball squad, I reported to the Junior Varsity (JV) team.  Essentially the JV team members were all Sophomores, with no one remaining from the 1951 team.  With nothing to do during Easter Week in early April, some of the team decided to practice on our own.  We met at either Wilson or at an elementary school in the Bixby Knowles area.  Where we practiced depended on who was attending.  These practice sessions continued into the Summer, because the majority of the JV team joined my 1952 American Legion team.  Playing on these teams along with practicing on our own, Milt Wilhite and I became good friends.  We both were outfielders and working out together made sense.  While I was the better outfielder (my opinion), Milt was definitely a much better hitter.  These workouts continued through the Summer and into the Fall semester. 

Well, one day just before school started Milt and I were practicing by ourselves, when Milt asked a very surprising question.  With no forewarning, Milt asked, “If you could get your folks’ car, would you be interested in a double date?”  Milt’s question caught me totally off guard, actually, his question came as a shock!  To my knowledge, Milt had never expressed any interest in girls, so his question peeked my curiosity.  My first response was something like, “Uhhhh, I don’t know.”  I was hesitant to say “yes”, because my first thought was there was no one I could ask.  I had dated Lanelle Jackson in the Spring of 1952, and she refused a second date.  Lanelle came to mind, but our date seemed ages ago and did not go well.  Since that date, there were no other “cuties” that had attracted my interest.  Perhaps I told Milt there was no one to ask, or he read my mind, or he knew I had no one in mind.  The reason behind Milt’s question was he wanted to date Mary Lou, a Sophomore at Jordan High School in North Long Beach, but he did not have a driver’s license and needed a driver with a car.  Thus, it was obvious why he was suggesting a double date.  His “plan” was to date Mary Lou and his cousin would be my date!  When he said my date would be his cousin, I thought, “Uh oh, was his cousin the proverbial “Ugly Duckling” that was un-dateable?  Milt’s “date plan” was to attend a Jordan High School football game against Compton High School in Compton.  When I asked how he knew Mary Lou, he said through his cousin Beverly Ann Wilhite, a Senior at Jordan High School.  Mary Lou and Beverly knew each other by belonging to the same Senior Girl Scout Mariner troop, which meant Milt had probably met Mary Lou while visiting Beverly.  In retrospect, I rather suspect that Milt and Beverly schemed together to set up this double date.  Best I can remember, Milt convinced me that Beverly was not the “Ugly Duckling” cousin no one would date.   Even with this information, there was some trepidation in my mind, but I wanted to help Milt with his “heart throb” so I agreed to be his wingman and date his cousin.  Of course, everything depended whether I could get my Dad’s permission to use the family car.  Dad said okay, so the double date was on.

On the “big” night driving to Milt’s house, there was a queasy feeling in my stomach.  After all, I knew only Milt, yet everyone else knew each other.  I thought this blind date was risky but then again, I might never see her again.  Boy, was that a wrong thought!  After picking up Milt, we headed for Mary Lou’s house.  My folk’s car was a 1950 four door Ford sedan.  Arriving at Mary Lou’s house, Milt went to the door, met Mary Lou’s parents and escorted her to the car.  Much to my surprise, Milt opened the rear door for Mary Lou, closed the door behind her and returned to the front seat with me!  Milt’s action started our double date off on a very strange note.  Although he introduced Mary Lou to me, I had no idea what was happening.  Milt said nothing except to direct me to Beverly’s house.  Arriving at her house, Milt indicated he would get Beverly.  While I thought this was unusual, entering a strange house and meeting his relatives, total strangers to me, would have been very intimidating.  When Milt and Beverly came to the car, Milt repeated what happened at May Lou’s.  He had Beverly sit with Mary Lou and returned to the front seat with me!  After introducing Beverly to me, we started for Compton’s football stadium.  Now I was confused but said nothing so as to NOT embarrass anyone.  Needless to say, my blind double date had a very interesting beginning, to say the least.

After we arrived at the football stadium and we were walking to the ticket booth, Beverly asked me, “Why was Mary Lou in the back seat and Milt in the front seat?”  I told her what happened when Milt brought Mary Lou to the car.  After the game was over, Beverly and I were walking together somewhat ahead of Milt and Mary Lou.  Beverly said, “Let’s walk fast and get to the car first, that way Milt and Mary Lou have to sit together.”  Walking fast, we arrived at the car first I opened the door for Beverly, and she got in the front seat.  Now Milt had to sit with Mary Lou.  My only memory of the rest of the evening was we took the girls home, and I took Milt home.  There is no recollection of what Milt and I discussed on the way to his house.  As it turned out, Milt never dated Mary Lou again.  I am not sure whether that was Milt’s or Mary Lou’s decision.  From my standpoint, the night out was not memorable, except for Beverly’s idea to force Milt and Mary Lou to sit together after the game.  Actually, this incident was my highlight of the evening.  Certainly, my overall experience of this blind double date was not unpleasant, and how events developed afterward has faded from memory.  All I know for sure is a second date with Beverly occurred.  Details leading to this second date can only be assumed, but these assumptions are close to what actually transpired.

Discussions with Milt about my blind date with Beverly, in some respect, must have been positive.  I don’t recall if Milt encourage me to ask for another date, or if Beverly suggested it to Milt, or if it was my idea or if it was none of these possibilities.  Whatever transpired, Milt gave me her phone number, I called and asked for another date and she accepted!  There is no memory of the time between these dates, but it was probably within a month of the double date.  What we did on this date has also been lost to history.  However, a miniature golfing date is remembered as one of our earliest dates after the blind date. We went r to Shady Acres, my favorite miniature golf course.  Shady Acres was located in the Bixby Knolls area and was the best miniature golf course I had ever played.  I had been going to Shady Acres on a regular basis for about three or four years, so it seems logical I wanted to take Beverly there.  Shady Acres was popular, and I seem to remember we played two rounds before leaving.  We had a good time on this date compared to the blind date, where we were really just chaperones for Milt and Mary Lou.  I do not remember if we did anything else afterward.  It is a safe bet that I took her straight home and walked her to the door.  This date allowed us to become better acquainted.  Since the miniature golf date was enjoyable for both of us, this date was followed by another and then another.  These following dates became regular, our relationship developed into a loving one and led ultimately to marriage.  Obviously, everyone would like to know details of how this journey to marriage developed.  Needless to say, this journey from a blind date to marriage cannot be told precisely.  However, what can be told will probably raise more questions than there are answers.

I believe only fools attempt to put words to how a loving relationship developed; I firmly believe the “how and why” must be left to Providence.  That being stated, here is my feeble effort at describing our journey.  After six plus decades of water flowing under the bridge, all that can be described are my remembrances of thoughts, feelings, events, etc.  As a result, my remembrances of our relationship journey may not be too coherent and certainly may not be in a chronological order.  Unfortunately, these memories cannot adequately describe our journey.  Most assuredly, Beverly’s memories will differ from mine in many, if not all, respects. 

Despite any differences in our memories about the journey, it took slightly less than three years from the blind date to our wedding.  We each were 17 years old when we met and less than a month past our 20th birthday when we married.  We met as High School Seniors and married as College Sophomores.  Today, rummaging through my memories, everything seems like a blur, because we went from adolescence to young adulthood in a short three years.  In maturity terms, this is a quantum jump and not an evolution!  I believe this maturity jump could only occur if the “heavens” were in proper alignment.  This alignment necessitates the existence of a mutual attraction, a mutual attraction based upon many factors that include both shared and accepted interests and experiences.  These factors include common interests, shared goals, respect for differing interests, similar family backgrounds, to name but a few.  As our dating progressed, it became apparent that any number of these factors were favorable, which indicated the “heavens" were aligning.  Of course, this aligning began with Beverly herself.

My first impressions of Beverly on that first blind date were positive.  Beverly seemed to have a sense of humor, based on her suggestion we hurry to the car so Milt and Mary Lou would have to sit together.  This attitude of devilishness was appealing, and matched my idea of what a date was all about.   Plus, it demonstrated she wanted Milt’s date to be a success, a positive indication she cared for her cousin.  As remarked above, she was not an “Ugly Duckling” but “easy on the eyes” (i.e., attractive).  Her hair was long, reaching to below her shoulders.  On this first date, she was dressed nicely, wearing a regular length dress.  As a guess, her only makeup was lipstick.  Beside these observations, Beverly did not impress me as a “social butterfly” or party girl” type.  This impression was undoubtedly reinforced by knowing Milt, his family and his description of her.  Belonging to a Senior Girl Scout Mariner troop probably influenced my impression also.  Subsequent dates confirmed my initial impressions about her.  On these later dates, our conversations turned towards discovering things about each other.  Early on, we knew neither of us were dating anyone else.  I recall she had dated her next-door neighbor but only once.  Mostly these first conversations centered on a wide variety of topics that allowed us to know each other better.  Since we attended different highs schools, exchanging information about our schools was a primary topic to discuss.

Beverly attended David Starr Jordan High School, located just over a mile from home.  She walked to Jordan and back, which was a three mile roundtrip.  In fact, she had always walked to school, because her schools were close to home.  I was stunned to think we had both attended Ulysses S. Grant Elementary School for the 1943/1944 school year (Second Grade).  Of course, we did not know whether we were in the same class or not.  The year we met she was taking third year Spanish and Advanced Algebra.  Although I was taking second year Spanish, we could not assist each other because her class was mostly Spanish literature and mine was grammar.  We had both taken Plane Geometry, but I had not continued taking math during high school.  We were both planning on attending college, but she had prepared better than I had, since I had harbored the idea of playing professional baseball.  Not only had she planned better for college, her grades were much better than mine.  Thus, I considered her a better student, but our intellectual abilities seemed to be comparable.  From my perspective, Beverly had the ability to think logically, basically an ability to think critically.  Plus, she was a very good conversationalist.  These abilities certainly increased her attractiveness.  We both had been involved in Scouting, although she progressed into Senior Scouts and I had not.  Neither of us smoked or used alcohol.  It certainly seemed from the beginning we shared several things in common. In addition to these personal similarities, our families and their histories were eerily similar in many respects, yet in other ways different.

I believe a major factor in aligning the “heavens’ for us was our similar family structures and family backgrounds.  In fact, the similarities could be considered eerie!  Both of us are native Californians, with Beverly born in Long Beach while I was born in Santa Ana.  However, our parents did not live in the town where we were born; her folks lived in Torrance and my folks lived in Orange.  Astrologically, we are both a Leo: Beverly was born 8 August 1935, while I was born 14 August 1935!  Yep, I married an older woman!  Another element we shared in common was our family structure.  While our family histories were similar, there were differences.  Our parents were from the Mid-West; her parents were from Kansas and Iowa, while mine were from Kansas and Illinois.  As you might suspect our parents all had different journeys to California.  Our family structures were similar, because we both were the eldest child that had a much younger sibling.  From this general overview of our families’ similarities, you can see a strong basis for our mutual attraction.  Those similarities provided a level of comfort; we did not feel like strangers in the others house.  By adding specific information about our families, it is possible to gain a clearer understanding how our families were part of the aligning process.

An initial description of Beverly’s genealogical background will aid in highlighting our families’ similarities and differences.  This description will begin with her Grandparents and will not extend to earlier generations.  To extend beyond this generation requires further genealogical research, which is not practical at this time.  This research will be conducted and presented in a future essay.  By limiting this discussion to her Grandparents captures what was known about her family heritage for many years.  The family names of Beverly’s Grandparents were Wilhite, Terrel, Jester and McCutcheon.  Beverly knew all her Grandparents, which was an experience different from mine.  It was my privilege to also have met them all.  The family histories to be described are based upon Beverly’s information and memories of what she related to me over the years.  Some family research has been done to verify various dates and locations.

Beverly’s paternal Grandfather was Edwin Dow Wilhite born 13 January 1886 in Emporia, Kansas.  Her paternal Grandmother was Myrtle May Terrell born 18 September 1888 in Emporia, Kansas.  Edwin Wilhite met and married Myrtle Terrell in 1906 in Emporia.  Their marriage resulted in two sons.  Virgil “John” Edwin Wilhite (Beverly’s father) born 5 July 1907 and Gomer Milton Wilhite (Milt’s father) born on 7 April 1909, both were born in Emporia, Kansas.  The 1910 Federal Census lists Edwin Wilhite as a hostler in a Round House industry.  Although I knew a Round House was associated with railroads, I had no clue what a hostler did, much less on a railroad.  Much to my surprise, and edification, a hostler took care of a visitor’s horse at roadside inns.  Thus, it seems Round House should have been Road House, the precursor of motels.  Sometime after the 1910 Census the Wilhite family moved from Emporia to Long Beach.  Draft records indicated Edwin Wilhite resided in Long Beach in 1918.  However, I remember Beverly telling me her Grandfather Wilhite worked for a railroad and the family lived in Pocatello, Idaho, before moving to Long Beach.  Federal Census records list her Grandad Wilhite as a driver in the shipyards (1920), Chef Operator for a telephone company (1930) and a fireman in the Long Beach Fire Department (1940).  I remember Beverly mentioning that he had retired from the Fire Department.  His other jobs came as a surprise.  The real surprise was that the 1930 Federal Census listed Grandmother Myrtle Wilhite as a fireman working for the Fire Department.  If the entry is correct, it is suspected she was working in some clerical position, because women were not hired as fireman until well into the 1970s or later.  However, it is possible Edwin was the fireman and Myrtle was the Chief Operator.  These jobs are more logical for the 1930s, but who knows?  According to these census records the Eighth Grade was their highest level of education, which was not uncommon for the early Twentieth Century.  However, it was also common for children to obtain education beyond their parents.  Thus, their two sons, Virgil and Gomer, both earned a high school diploma.  While I was aware Virgil attended Long Beach Poly High School, it is assumed Gomer attended Poly also.

Beverly’s maternal Grandfather was Albert Jester born 18 July 883 in Dawson Township, Iowa. Her maternal Grandmother was Dessie Pearl McCutcheon born 30 October 1886 in Paton, Iowa.  Albert Jester met and married Dessie Pearl McCutcheon on 10 January 1906 in Greene, Iowa.  Their marriage resulted in four daughters and one son.  Daughter Gladys P. was born in 1906 in Iowa, daughter LaVon Zetta born 13 November 1907 in Des Moines, Iowa, daughter Faye Loretta (Beverly’s mother) born 26 January 1909 in Ames, Iowa, son Maxwell A. born in 1913 in Pretty Prairie, Kansas and daughter Neva was born in August 1915 in Pretty Prairie, Kansas.  It is obvious the Jester family moved many times, since the first three daughters were all born in a different town.  All the Iowa towns are within 50 miles to the northwest of Des Moines.  Although Albert and Dessie were raised on a farm, they each earned a high school diploma.  According to the 1910 Federal Census the Jester’s had moved to Loda, Kansas where they farmed.  Then sometime prior to the 1920 Federal Census they moved to Pretty Prairie, where Albert became a painter.  It was here that Albert’s profession became a self-employed painter and wallpaper hanger.   Since there is no indication the year for this move, it has been assumed both Maxwell and Neva were born after the move to Pretty Prairie.  The 1925 Kansas Census lists the family living in Wichita, Kanas.  Again, there is no indication when the move to Wichita occurred, and her Grandparents never moved again, living in the same house until their passing.  Just like the Wilhite sons, the Jester children all earned a high school diploma.  Gladys and LaVon would have graduated from Pretty Prairie High School.  Although I was always under the impression that Faye also graduated from Pretty Prairie HS, the 1925 Kansas Census record list her age as 16, thereby raising the possibility she graduated from a Wichita high school.  It is also a safe assumption that both Maxwell and Neva graduated from a Wichita High School.

It is my recollection that I met Grandparents Edwin and Myrtle Wilhite before meeting Beverly.  They lived across the street from the school where Milt and I practiced baseball.  At this time, my contact with them was occasional at best, even after meeting and dating Beverly.  Grandmother Myrtle Wilhite passed in 1954 after battling cancer.  The length of the battle is unknown, but Beverly indicated she had radiation treatments and had been burned as a result.  After her death, Granddad Edwin Wilhite sold their house and bought a small one bedroom home nearby.  I saw him several times at Beverly’s house the next several years.  He passed away in 1957 with details of his death presented later. 

It is unclear when I met Grandparents Albert and Dessie Pearl Jester.  I’m sure it was at Beverly’s house.  While writing this essay, it was a surprise to discover that Grandmother Jester’s given name was Dessie.  I knew her only as Pearl.  When I saw Beverly this past Christmas (2016) it was a surprise that she knew Dessie was her given name.  Granddad Albert Jest was a quiet soul, but the same could not be said of Grandmother Pearl Jester.  She never saw a stranger and told, re-told and re-told the same stories to everyone, whether a family member or a stranger.  She repeated the story even if you told her you had heard it previously.  Her favorite saying was, “I’m a Jester and that’s no joke, I live a 701 South Holyoke.”  A rather unique way of providing her Wichita home address.  Grandmother Pearl Jester was my first experience with an elderly person with dementia, but did not understand it.  It was many years later before dementia was comprehended.  I saw them about three times when they visited Beverly’s folks, but never saw them in Wichita.  Grandmother Jester passed away 11 February 1967 and Granddad Jester passed away in May 1968.

This brief description of the Wilhite and Jester family background illustrates the similarities between the backgrounds of the Price and Graham families.  Beverly’s family history is centered in Kansas and Iowa, while mine is centered in Kansas and Illinois.  Both families originated in farming regions of those states.  We both had Grandparents that moved to California, while Beverly had Grandparents that did not leave Kansas.  Beverly’s parents and mine all had a different journey to California.  Beverly’s father and my mother arrived with their parents.  Beverly’s mother and my father came on their own.  Beverly has indicted she did not know what year Faye arrived in California.  Information was recently discovered that Faye Jester arrived in Californian in 1930.  Her name was discovered in a 1930 Los Angeles County voter register log.  Why she decided to leave Wichita is a mystery, and there is no memory of Beverly mentioning a reason either.  In fact, Faye was the only Jester sibling to leave Wichita until Gladys married and move to Arkansas.  In time, I learned some interesting stores about her parents. 

There is no recollection of hearing any story how Vigil and Faye met, nor how long they dated before marrying.  It was claimed Virgil was very shrewd and married Faye on her birthday in 1934.  Marrying her on her birthday served two purposes: first, he would not forget their anniversary or her birthday; second, he only had to buy one present to celebrate both!  Census records are unclear about Virgil’s employment in 1930, but listed him as a wage and salary worker.  By 1940 he was listed as a crane operator.  This record does not indicate the company that employed him.  When I met Beverly, he was working as a welder for US Steel in Torrance.  When the steel workers’ union went on strike, he would go to the shipyards, also working as a welder.  As mentioned previously, the Wilhites lived in Torrance when Beverly was born.  By 1940 they had purchased a house and moved to North Long Beach.  I seemed to remember Beverly indicating she was about two years old when they moved, which would be about 1937.  Beverly’s brother, Jon Mark, was born 1 September 1944.  When I first met Beverly, and was introduce to Jon Mark, I thought Jonmark was his first name.  It was only later that it was discovered that he was always referred to by his first and middle name.  I think this convention was used to prevent confusion between him and Virgil, because Virgil was always referred to as John.  So why was Virgil called John?  The reason is a rather interesting story.

It was several years before I learned that “John” was a nickname and Virgil was his given name.  Strange as it may seem, his nickname was acquired at his birth.  He was born at home around midnight on either 4 July or 5 July 1906.  When those present at his birth looked at the clock it was just after midnight.  Hence, his birth was recorded as 5 July, although there is a good possibility he was born on Independence Day.  When a next door neighbor asked, “What’s his name?” “Virgil”, they said.  The neighbor’s immediate reaction was, “Nonsense, he looks like a John!”  Hence, Virgil was known as John all his life by most everyone.  While this story about his nickname is interesting and humorous, there was a childhood accident that was both tragic and miraculous.  When John was about 12 or 14, he and Gomer were out playing in some open fields somewhere in Long Beach.  John had some dynamite caps in his pants pocket.  How he acquired them is not known.  Somehow, the caps detonated and nearly amputated his leg.  The explosion broke his femur and only the skin held the leg to his body.  A local doctor somehow set the bone and re-attached arteries, veins and suturing the skin in place.  This doctor performed a miracle, because John recovered full use of his leg. Remember, this accident occurred about 1920 and the state of medicine had not advanced to this level for many more years.  Once in a while you could detect a slight limp that was barely noticeable, Faye also has a unique story.  Faye’s story is an achievement that she was very proud of.  Faye was on the Pretty Prairie High School Debate Team.  Their team won the state championship, which is rather amazing considering the town had a population of about 400 souls.  If memory serves me right, they won the championship on the question, ‘Should the United States Join the League of Nations?” Her team argued against joining the League.

There were a number of unique family similarities that begin with our fathers and their brothers.  “John” Wilhite and Walter Price share the same birthdate, 5 July; Uncle Water was a year older.  Robert Price and Gomer Wilhite were both born on 7 April 1909.  All four were born in Kansas.  This type similarity doesn't end with our fathers and uncles, but continues with our parents.  Faye Jester and my Dad were both born in 1909, and my Mom was 15 months younger than Faye.  Eerie similarities continue with our cousins; Milt Wilhite was born 27 December 1936, and Carol Price was born 24 December 1936.  Thus, the age difference between us and our cousins is nearly identical!  Finally, Beverly and I each had a younger sibling, which was also of the opposite gender.  My sister, Roberta, was born 23 February 1943, which made our age difference about seven and a half years.  Beverly’s brother, Jon Mark, was born 1 September 1944, which made their age difference about nine years.  If these family similarities are not eerie, I do not know its definition.  Now, all these similarities were not immediately evident, but were noted over time. It is unclear if all these similarities were seen, but enough were identified that allowed us to be comfortable with each other and our families. Hopefully, providing some details about what we had in common, our differences and her family history enables a clear picture why we kept dating.  Plus, it cannot be stressed enough, how powerful similar family backgrounds aid in a couple being attracted to one another.  Yet, despite these similarities in our families and their backgrounds, my initial impressions of her family were the differences and not the similarities.

The Wilhite house at 1445 Phillips Street was built in the mid 1930s and was a classic
Spanish stucco design of the time.  A recent photo shows its current state.  There have been

Wilhite Residence, 1445 Phillips Street

some changes to its appearance but basically as I remember it.  The front door is just to the right of the arch way.  There was no ivy around the large bay window.  The window visible on the front porch is in the breakfast area.  There was a “back” porch on the side of the house that entered into a laundry room next to the kitchen.  There were three bedrooms, one bathroom, a dining room and the living room.  Overall the house was about 1300 square feet.  The garage was detached and set near the back of the lot.  The garage roof can be seen in the photo.  My first impression upon entering the house was, “Wow, these folks are rich!”  Now that comment is a little over the top!  It would be more accurate to say Beverly’s folks appeared to be more affluent than my folks.  This impression was based on comparing my folks’ house to her folk’s house.  Our house was 860 square feet with two bedrooms and one bathroom.  Plus, our kitchen and breakfast area were at least half the size of the theirs.  Plus, they had a laundry room and ours was in the garage.  What impressed me the most was thick wall to wall carpeting and two floor heaters.  Our living room had a large rug, which had replaced a large piece of linoleum.  Beverly had her own bedroom, a closet, a radio and a 45 RPM record player.  I slept with Granddad Graham, shared a closet with him, an ancient windup 78 RPM record player and our radio was in the front room.  These material differences certainly made an impression on me but did not have a negative impact.  Despite our similar family backgrounds, there were family dynamics differences that were noted.

The Wilhite family attended the North Long Beach Methodist Church on a regular basis.   Faye was intimately involved in the church’s activities.  She was one of the primary leaders of the women’s group that according to Beverly, “ran” the church.  At the time, the Methodist Church “frowned” on the use of tobacco and alcohol.  The use of these products was the primary doctrine of the WCTU (Women’s Christian Temperance Union).  John belonged to the Masons and adhered to the Methodist Church’s position on tobacco and alcohol use, although Beverly indicated he had an occasional beer with his union buddies.  My family dynamic was totally different.  My parents did not attend, or belong to a church; religion was not part of their life.  Dad claimed to be agnostic, while Mom did not indicate her religious belief.  Dad smoked cigarettes, about a pack per day, while Mom also used cigarettes occasionally.  My parents seldom used alcohol but not in the presence of Berta or me.  These family differences did not impact either of us in a negative manner.  Beverly and I also had differences in activities and interests.

Based on her family’s religious background, she attended church on a regular basis.  Because religion was not part of my family’s life, it was not part of my life either.  I had attended a Baptist church with our neighbors, the Cassidy family.  My attendance was sporadic at best, and was during my junior year at Wilson.  Beverly had a musical background and played the piano.  My musical background ended when I quit attempting to play the violin.  Beverly liked Popular music, while I enjoyed Country music (called Cowboy, or Hillbilly, music at the time).  I was athletic and interested in sports, while she was not too athletic; besides high school sports.  Whether she was interested in other sports I’m unsure.  I enjoyed hunting, fishing and camping; Beverly didn’t hunt or fish and I’m not sure about camping.  These personal differences were accepted with respect, and neither ask the other to change beliefs or behaviors.  Now that our personal and family similarities and differences have been noted, the tale of our journey can resume.  

You could call us “high school sweethearts” since we met and began our journey during our Senior year.  Describing our relationship in this manner, while correct, should not be confused with the common understanding of the term.  Usually one imagines a couple that live in close proximity and attend the same high school or even have known each other since childhood.  Not only did we attend different high schools, our houses were over five miles apart.  In today’s world, five miles seems like next door.  For us in the mid 1950s, those five plus miles made it seem like living in two different cities.  This two cities feeling resulted from traveling past the large undeveloped areas that existed between our homes.   That different city feeling was also possible, depending on the route selected that went through other cities. There were only two ways to get to Beverly’s house, by car or public bus.  Of course, Friday night dates meant a car was necessary, which I borrowed from my folks.  The summer after graduation, trips to her house began that required using public transportation.  These trips meant riding on two different buses, because there was not a direct bus line to her house.  On these trips to her place, I would call home and Dad would come and take me home.  Long before the Saturday visits began, there was another issue that arose early in our journey.  Attending two different high schools meant we only saw each other on Friday nights.  This meant the telephone became our only way to discover what happened in the other’s day. 

When I began telephoning Beverly on a regular basis, I have no recollection.  Was it before Christmas 1952 or after New Year’s 1953?  Whenever I started, it seems initially I called only a couple of times a week.  Eventually, I began calling every night except Friday.  I delayed calling until I was sure we had homework finished.  As such I delayed calling until about 8 PM.  Our conversations grew from around 15 minutes to about an hour.  Obviously, our relationship was becoming more serious when time length of phone conversations expanded.  There was just so much more to talk about.  However, this routine had to be adjusted.  First, Beverly complained my call interrupted the TV program I Love Lucy!  After she missed a couple of programs, I was given strict instructions NOT to call during this program.  Guess I found out who was really important!  Second, there were some nights these calls were short, because my folks needed to make a call or were expecting a call. Since the high school baseball season occurred from late January through mid-May, it is fairly certain that by this time I was calling almost every night, with the exception of “Lucy’s” night and when my folks needed the phone.  It is unclear whether our telephone calls carried into the weekend, but it is doubtful.  There was baseball, chores and family Sunday affairs.  During our Senior year, Friday night dates were a major element of our journey.

As we began dating after the miniature golf date, we usually went to the movies.  In fact, it became our standard date, if there is such a thing.  It was the “old reliable”, so to speak.  If in doubt what to do, go to the movies!  Plus, my finances were meager and movies were inexpensive.  Why we picked Friday for the date is not clear.  Perhaps it was selected because there was no homework due the next day and the weekend was for other things.  We went to both standard movie theatres and drive-in theatres.  We usually went to drive-in theatres, mostly because it was more private and intimate.  At times the movie we wanted to see was only at a regular “walk-in” theatre, so we gave up the privacy for the movie.  Usually, there were two movies, but if there was only one, we would just cruise the city.  If we were listening to the car radio at 10 PM, she wanted to listen to KMPC AM to listen to the last song of the day as the station went off the air.  Her favorite song KMPC played was Smoke Gets In Your Eyes.  We saw all types of movies, usually the most popular at the time.  The more memorable movies for 1952 and 1953 were: Moulin Rouge, The Moon is Blue, Shane, From Here to Eternity, The Robe, Peter Pan, Stalag 17, Lady Chatterley’s Lover, House of Wax, Julius Caesar and Calamity Jane.  Movies listed were limited to these years because this was early in our journey.  It should be noted a number of these films nominated, or won the Academy Award for best movie of the year.  The Moon is Blue, House of Wax, Lady Chatterley’s Lover, From Here to Eternity and Shane have special memories associated with them.  The Moon is Blue was advertised as being risqué and sexual.  Well, it was so risqué and sexual that these teenagers missed the point.  The movie was too subtle for us.  House of Wax was a horror film, which we usually avoided.  But this horror film was one of the first 3D movies, so it was a must see!  Special glasses had to be worn for the 3D effect.  The effect was great, but the movie was lousy.  Lady Chatterley’s Lover was considered “adult”, but the dialog was French.  There were subtitles, but they proved to be difficult to read.  Consequently, we missed understanding a literary classic.  Even if it was an “adult” movie, it there were no graphic scenes.  In the case of From Here to Eternity, I had read the novel prior to seeing the movie.  Now the novel was risqué, sexy and graphic, but I did not tell Beverly the details.  This move was Frank Sinatra’s first movie and he won the Best Supporting Actor Award.  To me Shane was the best western after Stagecoach with John Wayne.  Little did I realize the movie was filmed here in Jackson Hole.  The remains of the Shane cabin still exist, and I have visited it in summer and winter.  A photo of the cabin shows its current state, with the Grand Tetons in the background.   While the large majority of our dates involved movies, there were a few other date types during our senior year.


Shane Cabin, Circa 2008

The Wilson Drama class, I think, produced the operetta Moulin Rouge. We attended one of the performances, which involved scenes we later saw in the movie of the same name.  I do not recall it being anything special, but have a hazy memory of not being impressed.  The summer after graduation, Beverly attended some of my baseball games, but I’m not sure those could be considered dates.  In addition, there were the high school proms, which will be covered later.  Initially, I could not recall whether we attended any high school athletic event.  The main reason for this was during baseball season, Beverly had no way get to our games.  After probing the depths of my high school memories, one unique date rose to the surface.  What triggered this memory was remembering an incident that happened during the date.

This particular date occurred about three months after our blind date.  At the time of this date, it is unclear if we had begun dating regularly.  It is unclear, because Milt accompanied us. Milt’s presence was not to chaperone us, he was with us for a specific reason.  For this date, we decided to take a late night swim in Alamitos Bay.   The genesis of this stunt has been lost and who. or what, prompted it I am not sure. If memory serves me right, Milt was the culprit.  What prompted this idea I am not sure, but there is a fuzzy memory that Milt was responding to a dare.  I have a suspicion the subject arose between Milt and Beverly and resulted in the dare.  I joined the dare so as not to appear “chicken” to Beverly!  Because we did not want our folks to know about this swim, we said we were going to a Wilson football game.  In a sense, we attended the game to “cover” our planned Alamitos Bay swim after the game.  We were concerned that if our parents knew about the swim they would not approve, and put a stop to the plan.  What subterfuge teenagers dream up to keep parents in the dark!  The game was Wilson’s 1952 season finale against our arch rival Poly.  Wilson lost the game, which during my high school years, Poly HS was the dominant football team in Long Beach, with Jordan a close second.  After the game, we drove to Naples for the swim.

Naples is an affluent neighborhood to the east of downtown Long Beach, and is built on three islands located in Alamitos Bay.  These islands are separated by “canals”, hence the derivation of the name Naples.  A map of Naples shows the islands, canals and its location in Alamitos Bay.  Alamitos Bay provides direct access to the Pacific Ocean as the map shows.


Naples and Alamitos Bay

A reason for selecting Naples is probably based on a belief that the area would be apt to be quiet with few observers present.  It was around mid-November, rather cool and with water temperatures in the 50s.  We drove to the central park area nearest the bay.  As we planned, when we arrived there did not appear to be anyone around. We were wrong!  After exiting the car, there was a ruckus caused by someone beating on a USPS mailbox.  Remembering this particular incident, brought the football game and swim story from the depths of my memories.

The fellow pounding on the mailbox was a Wilson football player venting his frustration for losing the game.  Milt approached the fellow and discovered it was Tony Caminetti, someone we both knew.  Milt engaged him and by agreeing with him that Poly players were no good guys, Tony calmed down enough to quit beating the mailbox.  After discussing the game for a few minutes, Tony, feeling somewhat better, left the area. Now Milt and I prepared for our swim.  Although I had committed to joining in the swim, I approached it with trepidation.  As noted in Formative Years: 1950 to 1953, I was not a good swimmer and the water looked like a black hole this November night.  Plus, I knew there was no possibility of touching bottom.  Milt dove in first, but came right back out.  I went next, dove in, surfaced and swam to the steps to get out of the bay.  The water was so cold, colder than I had expected.  Once out of the water. I began to feel really warm.  Feeling warm seemed strange in the night air, even though dripping wet!  Well, I guess we proved something but not sure what.  We dried off, and I took Milt and Beverly home.  After dragging this memory from the depths, and ruminating about the Naples incident, another event surfaced that may have been the catalyst for our journey.

When we first began dating, the usual procedure was to park my car on the street in front of her house.  Then I would climb the steps to the front porch and knock on the front door.  Most of the time Beverly answered the door and invited me into the living room.  There were times Faye, or John, opened the door and invited me into the house.  On most occasions, Beverly was ready, and we left after some conversation about what we were going to do.  If she was not quite ready, probably because I arrived early, I would take a chair and talk to her folks.  Sometimes I watched the TV program they were watching and sometime we would discuss the program.  Once Beverly was ready and we finished talking with her folks, we would leave by the front door.  There was a different process when returning her home after our date.  I still parked the car on the street, opened her door and we walked to the “back” porch.  Beverly did not want to use the front door, because it was too noisy.  Usually, her folks had gone to bed, and she did not want to disturb them.  We both climbed the steps onto the porch and she would unlock the door.  After we said our “good nights”, she opened the door, entered and closed the door.  Then, one night, everything changed.  This night, we walked to the “back” door and we stood on the back porch as usual to say “good night.”  It was then, we had our first kiss, and Beverly kissed me!  I was totally surprised but returned the kiss.  No idea how long we had been dating when this kiss occurred, but this moment surely marked the beginning of our journey.  It is safe to assume that after this night, we began steady dating.  After we began steady dating, it was time to meet her closest friends and the fellows they were dating or would date.

Details of meeting Beverly’s friends has been lost through the years.  One reason it has been lost came about because we both lost contact with them.  Contact was maintained for a while after we married, but college, kids and relocations diminished our contact with them.  With some degree of certainty, I was introduced to them while we were in high school.  Who I met first is a mystery, as well as the circumstances.  These friends were Billie Gamo, Shirley Goldsmith, Anadel Peterson and Leah (family name forgotten).  There could have been other friends, but these four were the most important to her.  Best I can recall, we visited everyone’s house except Leah’s.  We had the most contact with Anadel and Shirley.  Contact with Billie during high school was somewhat limited, and contact with Leah was the least.  All Beverly’s friends attended Jordan with her, and to my recollection all were Seniors. To the best of my knowledge only Anadel had a boyfriend when I first met her.  Her boyfriend was “Chuck”, and he had graduated from high school either one or two years before Anadel.  There is a faint memory that Chuck and Anadel had been going steady for at least two years.  Both Shirley and Leah met their boyfriends sometime after Beverly and I began dating.  Shirley’s boyfriend was Frank Tomlin, and Leach’s boyfriend was Jim Cushman.  Both Frank and Jim attended Poly High School, and how they met is a mystery.  Frank and Jim may have known each other, but that is just a guess.  Beverly and Billie were childhood playmates since the Gano family lived on Philips Street, about six or eight houses from the Wilhite family.  After a tragic accident, the Gano family moved to a new house.  The accident occurred on a Sunday as the family was leaving for church.  Mr. Gano backed the car over their young son. resulting in his death.  Billie married a fellow from Wilson High School, Dan Talbot.  Strange as it seems, I remembered Dan when we met about eight years after graduating from Wilson.  Dan graduated the same year I did, and when we met he was attending USC dental school.  Billie and Dan Talbot will appear in a later essay.  Meeting Beverly’s friends, getting to know her folks, introducing her to my folks, it seemed high school graduation was upon us before we knew it.  Even thinking back to those years, everything seems a blur.  The school year went so fast, remembering all that happened cannot be unlocked from my memory.  Only memories of the last couple of events of the school year come to mind.

As explained in High School Years: 1950 to 1953 we attended senior proms at both Wilson and Jordan.  Well, that essay neglected to relate what we did on graduation night, and this event came to mind while preparing this essay.  A couple of years before we graduated, several high school graduates were killed in an auto accident during their graduation celebration.  As a result, the Long Beach School District decided to promote an all-night graduation party for graduates of the three Long Beach high schools.  All graduates were encouraged to attend this party.  There would be bands for dancing, refreshments and other entertainment activities.  This party would start about 10 or 11 PM following the graduation ceremonies.  Once you entered the party, you had to stay until morning.  Bill Haley’s classic “Rock Around the Clock” comes to mind.  As such, it would be about 8 AM before you could leave.  Beverly and I decided to attend rather than take part in any other celebrations.  This graduation party was held at the Long Beach Municipal Auditorium, essentially located downtown on the beach.  How we got to the auditorium I do not recall.  Perhaps one of our folks took us, or maybe one of Beverly’s friends.  All I know we did not drive ourselves.  How we passed the time is also a blank!  One can surmise that this night was on the boring side, because what we did, who was there cannot be brought to mind.  It seems we did lots of sitting and maybe dozing some.  What teenager can go over 24 hours without sleeping!  I have no idea how we got home.  Probably, the first thing after leaving the auditorium was to have breakfast but that is also unclear.  Following this all-night party, we continued dating, began thinking about college and began our 1953 summer activities.

By the time our summer started, I had begun to use “Bev” instead of Beverly whenever we talked, or I referred to her.  This convention lasts until today.  My summer was filled with baseball, practicing and playing my last year of American Legion baseball.  It seems Bev had been hired to compile names and addresses for the Long Beach City Directory.  She was assigned to the Lakewood Village area, which I knew like the back of my hand.  Bev arranged for me to use her Dad’s car, a 1937 Dodge Couple shown in the photo.


1937 Dodge Coupe

John’s Dodge did not have a new paint job, but was the original gray color that had faded terribly.  I would use public buses to reach her house to get Bev and the car.  Then we drove to her area assigned for the day.  She would get out and gather the information while I waited in the car, either twiddling my thumbs or listening to the radio, if there was one.  Once she finished we drove back to her house.  After arriving at her house, I either took buses home, or was invited for dinner.  If I stayed for dinner, Dad would come pick me up after dinner.  Invitations to dinner became a standard routine on Saturdays, with Dad picking me up afterwards.  This routine was followed until we married.  Now our journey continued into the college years.

After a summer of baseball and city directory activities, our college journey began at Long Beach City College (LBCC) in September 1953.   Bev and I had dated throughout our senior year, and our relationship had turned serious. We also began planning to attend college together.  Our reasons for enrolling at junior college is somewhat a mystery because obtaining a Bachelor’s Degree was not possible.  My reasons for selecting LBCC were detailed in the essay College Years: 1953 to 1969.  A brief summary of those reasons was based on the belief of our family; we were not knowledgeable of what was required for college.   Neither of my folks had attended college, and I am not sure we really understand the difference between universities and junior colleges.  At some point, we decided I should start at LBCC, since it was so close to home.  In addition, the LBCC tuition was very minimal, because costs were a major factor in selecting LBCC.  College costs were important because I was broke and my folks could not afford more.  Bev’s reason for selecting LBCC are not known, perhaps her reasons were similar to mine.  I cannot dismiss the possibility that she planned it from the start with her folks.  There is a slight chance Bev and I planned on LBCC without consulting our folks.  This last thought has little merit, because there is not the slightest memory of us planning this together.  Once we enrolled, we selected different majors for different reasons.

Bev chose Education as a major, with the goal of becoming a school teacher.  My impression was that Bev chose Education after discussions with Faye about potential career choices. Bev indicated Faye had always wanted to teach but she never had the opportunity.  It was unclear whether Bev really wanted to teach, or if she was avoiding arguments with Faye.  Engineering was my major selection.  As discussed in the college essay, my selection was based on, “Uh, I guess Engineering.”  It was a “seat of the pants” decision, because I had no idea what I wanted to do when I grew up!  My folks and I had never discussed what interests I had or wanted to be.  The only thing known for sure was they wanted me to attend college.  After completing our studies at LBCC, we both changed our majors, also for different reasons.  After selecting our majors, we enrolled in our first college classes.

Beginning a college education was unfamiliar territory for us, especially me.  Thus, after selecting a major, we followed our counselor’s class recommendations for our first semester.  Because Bev had planned better in high school, she undertook classes that totaled 15 or 16 units (credits).   Again, since she had planned ahead all her classes were college level courses.  As I had not planned well, my class schedule consisted of high school “makeup” courses that totaled only 13 units.  Despite taking only 13 units, total class hours equaled, or exceed, Bev’s class hours. High school Chemistry consisted of lecture and lab hours, but Drafting was more like a laboratory class.  First year students did not have any priority in selecting our classes; retuning students had first choice for picking their classes.  In fact, I had to take algebra in a night class, because all the day classes were filled.  As a result, we were unable to coordinate our schedules, and we saw little of each other at school during the week.  After finishing the first semester, we hoped to coordinate our schedules better the second semester.

For the second semester, we did not consult with any counselor, because we had become “wise” college students and were aware of what courses were needed for our major.  This semester, we each were taking classes totaling 15 units.  We were able to coordinate our schedules somewhat better but not by much.  Bev had one lecture/lab class, but I had two lecture/lab classes and drafting.  Bev and I were able to take a U.S. History class together.  The class was so easy; it did not require long hours of study to pass the tests.  Basically, we just reviewed our class notes to score well on the exams.  This history class was the only college course we took together.  Besides my regular classes, this semester included my attempt to make the LBCC baseball team.  As explained in the essay A Baseball Journey, I did not make the team.  Being cut from the team was my greatest disappointment while attending college.  Not making the team dealt a serious blow to my confidence, which I did not handle well.  Failing at something you love makes you face reality, which I immediately attempted to ignore.

The morning following the intra-squad game, Coach Hicks posted a list of the players that had made the team.  My name was not on the list!   Being cut from the team was my first real failure, since beginning to play organized baseball.  Thinking back, it was probably my first failure at anything I had ever attempted.  Needless to say, I was in shock when leaving the gym, because I still had classes to attend and new PE classes had to be substituted for baseball.  Attending math and engineering classes that day forced me to temporarily push baseball from my mind until I met Bev in the afternoon.  When we met, we both had finished our classes for the day.  Usually, we both went home at this point, but I did not want to go home.  I did not want to face my folks and answer questions about being cut.  Bev seemed to understand not facing questions from my folks, so I went with her to her house.  Avoidance of my folks only lasted until that evening when I called and had Dad pick me up at Bev’s.  My folks knew how I felt, and there was no questioning like I had feared.  Despite being cut from the college team, my baseball journey continued, as described in the noted essay.  Completing this semester, we headed into the 1954 summer.

This summer represented several first for both of us.  We both entered the work force by obtaining temporary jobs, as described in the College Years essay.  Bev was hired by the Lakewood Village Movie Theatre and worked the concession stand selling candy, drinks and popcorn.  Milt and I were hired by Flour Corporation as welder’s helpers.  We obtained this job through the assistance of Charlie Jordan, a neighbor and friend of the Wilhites.  Charlie was the foreman of the welding shop at Flour and obtained a waiver from the union for us.  Milt and I drove to work every week day into downtown Los Angeles.  We took turns driving each week.  These jobs were the first wage earning jobs for the three of us.  Another first for me was a summer night class.  Analytic Geometry was a prerequisite for Calculus, and I needed Calculus for the Fall semester.  This class was three nights a week for six weeks, plus homework.  Guess I learned to study and work 40 hours a week much earlier than I thought.  Plus, I took Bev home from her theatre job when she was working.  You might say it was a busy summer.  Actually, retuning to college in the fall of 1954 was much easier, and at least it seemed like it.

Starting our second year at LBCC, Bev was a Sophomore and I was somewhere between a Freshman and a Sophomore.  Perhaps you could call me a Freshmore, or a Sophman, since I had no college classes my first semester, only high school level courses.  Bev’s classes were directed toward a teaching degree, while mine were dominated by math, physics and engineering classes.  While the College Years essay detailed these classes, there was one class that was not engineering related, psychology.  Whether it was a fall or spring class I do not recall.  What I do remember is the term paper that was required.  My paper was on Adolf Hitler.  Based on a couple of papers I read, my conclusion was that Hitler was a schizophrenic.  This conclusion may or may not be accurate, but he was certainly an evil, raving madman!  At this time, my writing ability was not well developed, because engineering classes did not require writing skills, only problem solving abilities.  Fortunately, Bev’s writing skills were excellent and she really was helpful.  Although we collaborated on the paper, it was Bev’s skills that resulted in a passing paper.  In fact, she typed it, because my family did not have a typewriter.  As we approached the summer of 1955, little did we realize our future life would experience a profound change.  Events and decisions that brought about these changes were covered in the College Years essay.  Re-reading this portion of the essay raised serious questions concerning the chronology and rationale for decisions made, or not made, regarding college and our future.  Unfortunately, the “when and why” have been lost to Father Time!  As such, what transpired will be summarized, and these recent questions noted.

Beginning the summer of 1955, both of us had found jobs.  Bev had returned to her job at the Lakewood Village Movie Theatre; while I had been hired as a draftsman at Douglas Aircraft Company.  Obviously, Bev’s job was temporary, and I believe she was planning to transfer to Long Beach State College (LBSC) to earn a Bachelor’s degree in Education.  The draftsman’s job was also just a summer job, since all ‘beginning” Engineering courses had been completed, and a transfer to an Engineering school was necessary.  My plan was to transfer to University of California, Berkley (It should be noted tuition was about $500/year).  Why UC Berkley?  LBSC did not have an engineering program, and my guess is that UCLA did not have an Electrical Engineering program.  Bev and I had a serious relationship at this point, and were we really considering attending colleges over 500 miles apart?  Because of our relationship, perhaps she was also planning on UC Berkley and not LBSC.  Nothing triggers any memory that can answer these questions.  Whatever the answer to these questions may be, very early in the summer, a major decision was made that changed everything.  Some background needs to be covered before discussing that decision.

As previously mentioned, during my Junior year in high school I had attended a Baptist church with our neighbors.  Attendance was usually on Sunday evenings with a high school group followed by a regular church service.  Although those in the high school group attended Wilson, there was no one I knew.  The following church service was somewhat mandatory because my neighbors always attended it.  Best I can recall, my attendance was not very regular.  However, my attendance was often enough to merit a personal visit to see me at home.  His visit was on a Saturday, and Dad was home.  Dad and I were in the front room and saw the minister walking to the front door.  Dad said, “Remember, he is nothing but a salesman!”  It was much later in life when I understood the meaning of his comment.  Whatever his “salesman’s” message that day, I declined being baptized and joining a church.  I declined primarily due to a lack of knowledge about Christianity.  Attending the Baptist Church seemed to be more about socializing than religion.  Attending church did not spark or ignite a desire to learn about Christianity.  Dating Bev re-introduced me to church.

I began going to the North Long Beach Methodist Church with Bev just before we began attending LBCC.  My attendance could have begun before high school graduation, but attendance then would have been at best sporadic.  Accompanying Bev to church became regular during our first year at LBCC.  Whose idea it was to attend church with her is not clear.  Most probably she invited me, but it could have been my idea to see her more often.   All things considered, self-interest in seeing her more often was probably the major motivation, regardless who suggested it.  Since my family’s life was not religious, attending church was not solely to embrace religion.  When first going to church with Bev, the only thing known about the Methodist religion was that the use of alcohol and tobacco was considered “sinful”.  This Methodist tenant was fine with me, because I used neither.  In all honesty, I had no knowledge concerning the basic Christian beliefs or its tenants.  Listening to Sunday sermons along with conversations with Bev and Faye, I gained some understanding of Christianity.  What had been gained still lacked a complete grasp of what it meant to be a Christian.  Hopefully, this background concerning my religious experiences, both before and after dating Bev, aids in understanding decisions made in 1955.

As you can probably guess, the decision that changed our lives was when I decided to ask Bev to marry me.  Here again, my memories are muddled as to why this decision came about in the middle of acquiring a college education.  Perhaps our relationship had reached the point that unintended consequences might occur, and neither of us wanted that to happen.  This thought is pure conjecture, because there is no memory that we ever discussed marriage, nor was it even mentioned.  Marriage must have been in my thoughts, because I made the decision to ask her by late June or early July.  This time period had to be not more than about six weeks after starting the job at Douglas.  What in “Sam Hill” was I thinking? Why did I want to marry immediately?  Did I consider an engagement until after we graduated from college?  Had I really thought through the ramifications rationally? Did I consider how marriage affected our college education?  Did I consider the monetary cost of marriage?  Or how stable was the Douglas job?  Did I ever think about an unintended pregnancy after marriage?  The answer to these and other similar questions is a resounding NO!  After all, what lovesick 19 year old would ever think to consider these questions and answer them honestly?  Certainly, not me!  After Bev said, “Yes,” did she answer these questions either?  Only she knows for sure, but my guess is not really.  Where were we when I proposed?

We were at her house when I proposed.  As mentioned earlier, at the conclusion of a date we would walk to her backdoor and say goodnight.  There were times when we returned from a date, her parents had gone to bed.  Eventually, when that occurred, we would enter the backdoor, go to the living room and “watch TV”.  We would then say goodnight after maybe a half hour, and I would leave.  One night we were sitting on the couch, talking about I know not what.  I got on my knees and ask her to marry me.  Bev said yes.  I am not sure what we did next or when we told our parents.  There is one pertinent question to be answered:  How long had marriage been on my mind?  I am not sure, but there are two conflicting memories that suggest not long.  An engagement ring never entered my mind, and I had not purchased wedding rings.  How’s that for planning ahead?  Hence, it appears there had been little or no previous thought of marriage.  On this basis, my proposal appears to have been spur of the moment.  Answering the pertinent question above may conflict with a spontaneous proposal.

I clearly remember thinking about marriage, but when did the idea first appear in my thoughts?  Whenever it entered my thoughts, it was my firm belief that church membership was required.  Surely an indication on my part, that church protocols were not understood.  Given this belief, I decided to join the North Long Beach Methodist Church.  I am completely unclear whether this life decision was made before or after the proposal.  Before joining a church, it was a requirement that prospective members attend a new member class.  Time between the proposal and the wedding was no more than two months, probably closer to six weeks.  Thus, it is unlikely a membership class was offered within this small window.  In reality, I do not remember taking such a class.  Regardless, if a membership class was taken, I was baptized, accepted Christ into my life and joined the church.  Did I accept this sacrament under false pretenses?  Perhaps, but this decision became truthful in time   Based on these events, it appears marriage had entered my mind prior to proposing, but this reasoning is pure conjecture.  Maybe it is pure conjecture, but so many things had to happen in such a short time.  Scheduling the church, invitations, bridal shower, getting rings, marriage license, selecting a wedding party, tux rentals and the list goes on.  Amongst all the pre-wedding chaos, there are only a few memories of activities during this period.

It is my recollection that Bev informed Faye of our desire to marry.  Faye’s reaction to this information is not known.  I do not know if Faye or Bev told John about our decision, or exactly when.  It seems that a couple of weeks after Bev told Faye, Bev told me John was unhappy I had not talked with him.  Asking Bev to marry me was undertaken without knowing anything about the protocol of asking John’s permission first.  I was just a dumb teenager who knew nothing of marriage customs.  The idea of talking to John, scared me to death!  Bev had told me that he was very stern, essentially the “enforcer” in the family.  As a result, I was at Bev’s one evening waiting for John to arrive from work.  Waiting in the living room, we heard him enter the back door and stopped in the laundry room.  I went to the laundry room to talk with him while he put down some of stuff from work.  I began by apologizing for not talking with him earlier, then blabbered on about my Douglas job, the airplanes we were building, etc.  Further, I told him Bev would continue in college and I would resume after a year or so.  John said not a word and never even looked at me.  Now I was really scared!  Best I can recall, he did not respond immediately nor did he object to our plans.  Since the proposal and scheduling of the wedding appeared to be on a “hurry up basis”, I would not be surprised if her parents and mine believed it was a “necessary” wedding.  They may have held their collective breaths for a few months.  As stated in the College Years essay, we promised our folks to finish college and not have any children until we both finished college.  They also probably held their breaths for that too.  Following my discussion with John, Bev and I had to meet with the pastor before he would conduct the ceremony.

Prior to meeting the pastor, we had to get a blood test and get a marriage license.  To me, it was strange the minister wanted to talk to us before marrying us.  Here again, I had no idea of the usual protocols for a church wedding.  Of course, the purpose of the meeting was to assess whether we were ready for marriage.  We met in the office of Roy C. Mason, pastor of the North Long Beach Methodist Church.  I remember little of our conversations, but I remember him asking questions about why we loved each other, what we were planning in way of college and having a family.  After we finished our conversation, we left his office and my only thought was the wedding was next.  It was years later that I learned the Revered Roy C. Mason recommended that we NOT get married!  If true, it is a classic case of a teenager listening but not hearing!  Sadly, his recommendation cannot be verified.  Whether valid or not, the topic was never mentioned by either Bev or Revered Mason.  Whatever he advised us, the wedding preparation proceeded and we were married on Sunday, August 28, 1955.

Our wedding party was small consisting of Shirley Goldsmith, Leah, Anadel Peterson, Bruce Llewellyn, Milt Wilhite and Del Nadeau (maybe).  Best I can recall Shirley was Maid of Honor, with Leah and Anadel as Bridesmaids.  Bruce was Best Man, with Milt and Del as Groomsmen.  There is a fuzzy memory that Bev’s wedding gown was borrowed and modified by Faye to fit Bev.  Faye bought material and made the dresses for Shirley, Leah and Anadel.  Bruce, Milt and Del had to rent their own tuxes, because I did not have any money.  It was not an expensive wedding. Our wedding rings were yellow and white gold bands, with no diamonds.  I had wanted Milo Kellogg to be Best Man, but Milo was in the US Army stationed in South Korea.  After the ceremony, there was a reception at the church, with a cake and punch.  Following the reception, Bruce drove us through North Long Beach, honking the horn all the way to the Wilhites’ house.  Here we opened some presents in front of the wedding party and family.  After we changed our clothes, Bev and I left on our honeymoon. 

Because I had just started to work at Douglas, I had no vacation time for a honeymoon.  Given the circumstance, my supervisor let me take off a few days without pay.  How many days I took off is long forgotten.  Best I can recall is that I returned to work on Thursday.  The wedding events had made it a long day, and we did not get out of the Los Angeles area on Sunday night.  We drove to Morro Bay, California, for the rest of our honeymoon.  Why we picked Morro Bay has been lost to history.  A photo of us standing by our car ready to leave for Morro Bay.  You may remember this photo from the College Years essay.

Royal & Beverly Price, Sunday August 28, 1955
Returning from Morro Bay we went to our apartment, rented prior to the wedding.  This apartment was located on Business Street, near Lincoln Avenue and Long Beach Boulevard in the Bixby Knowles area of Long Beach.  It was a one bedroom apartment located over an elderly couples’ home.  There was a small kitchen and a large living room that stretched across the apartment’s width.  Between the living room and the front of the apartment was another room that was about five to six feet in width.  We used this room to store some of our wedding gifts.  In time, we discovered this storage room floor was not level and slated toward the front of the place!   There was no garage, and entrance into the apartment was gained via an outside stairway located at the rear of the owner’s house.  The place was quite old, but the rent fit our budget, and was only $50 per month. Sadly, the house and apartment no longer exists, but it certainly was a memorable first apartment.

It must be noted, prior to the wedding, Bev was shocked that she needed to learn to drive.  I began teaching her in my 1941 Ford Coupe.   The Coupe had a manual transmission, which meant she had to learn to use a clutch to do manual shifting.  My lessons were not going well and Dad saved my bacon by taking over and teaching her to drive and especially how to parallel park.  She passed her driving test without any trouble and was a good driver.  After the honeymoon, Bev drove me to Douglas, then continued on for classes at Long Beach State College (LBSC).  After work, I would meet her in the Douglas parking lot, then head home for dinner.

Best I can recall, we lived at the Business Street apartment for about six months before moving.  Our new apartment was on Carson Street that was within walking distance to LBCC.  This move was closer to both Douglas and LBSC.  Rent for this apartment was higher than for the first apartment, but I received a pay increase when I transferred from the Tracing Unit to the Power Plant Group.  There were four apartments in the building and we were in the middle of the building complex.  The apartment had one bedroom and was on the ground floor.  There was a large kitchen with a dining area.  There was a front door in the living room and a backdoor in the kitchen.  We had a parking space behind the apartment with access via an alley.  These apartments had been built during World War II, which m meant there was a large concrete pad with a foundation for garages.  A recent photo shows our front porch and the apartment complex.

 5303 E. Carson Street

Today, the vegetation is out of control compared to when we occupied it!  All the plants on the right did not exist in 1956, rather it was all well-kept lawn.  There was a white picket fence located about on the right photo edge.  Windows on this side of the front porch were in the living room.  Our bedroom was just past the front porch, and there was not any second porch as there is today.  The rear apartment front door was on the side.  We liked to sleep with our bedroom window open but normally had to close it.  The rear apartment’s living room was just beyond our bedroom.  An elderly couple usually watched TV past the time we went to bed.  Sound from the TV shows they watched was too loud to keep our window open.  It should be noted, there was no satellite TV service, only direct broadcast from Mount Wilson.  Commercial Satellite TV was no invented until about 30 or40 years in the future.

There was one other advantage to this place, it was within walking distance to LBCC.  It had been discovered that a second semester of English was required to satisfy the California Education Requirements for a Bachelor’s Degree.  As a consequence, I enrolled in a night English 2 class for the spring semester of 1956.  This English class concentrated on literature rather than grammar.  One assignment was to read Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet.  It did not make sense to me until the instructor reviewed it in class.  That was a real learning experience.  There was one very unusual event that occurred while living here.

One afternoon we were in the living room watching TV when there was a load noise.  I jumped up and started for the windows.  Just as I neared the windows, a car plowed through our yard, through the picket fence, crossed the lawn and crashed into a planter box of the next door apartment complex.  Thinking there would probably be an injured driver, I ran through the hole in the fence and approached the driver’s door.  To my great surprise, there was no one in the car, not even a passenger!  I was totally bewildered how the car got here.  What had happened was this car was being towed eastbound on Carson Street only by a rope.  The rope came loose or broke, and the car went its own way.  The car jumped the island dividing Carson Street, crossed the westbound lane, went between parked cars, jumped the curb and its getaway run was stopped by the planter box.  It was amazing that no one was injured and the only damage was to the picket fence and planter box.  While this incident was the most exciting event that happened while we lived here, there were also a couple of sad events.  Both Granddad George P. Graham and Granddad Edwin D. Wilhite passed away while living here.

Granddad Graham died 4 June 1956, actually not too long after we moved here.  His health had deteriorated, and he was taken to a Los Angeles County Hospital in the South Los Angeles area.  His decline continued, and he passed away a few days later.  Unfortunately, we were not able to visit him before he passed away.  Grandad Wilhite passed away about a year later, but some background needs to be told first.

John and Faye bought a mountain cabin in the Moonridge area East of Big Bear City, possibly in 1955.  We helped them put fiberglass insulation in the attic to winterize the cabin.  The cabin was old, but the area was quiet and a good place to spend a weekend.  There were adequate beds for the four of us, and Bev and I used it a few times.  Just before we were to start at LBSC, we were going to join her folks Labor Day weekend at the cabin.  Faye called us the morning and wanted us to check on Granddad Wilhite on our way to their house.  He did not answer the phone and they were concerned about him.  We stopped by his house and knocked on the door, but there was no answer.    We went to her folks’ house, and I went with John back to Granddad’s house.

John had a key and we enter the living room.  We found Granddad lying in bed, apparently having passed away in his sleep.  In shock, John sat down on the living room couch, while I went to the phone and called Bev with the sad news.  Faye and Bev told me to call a well known mortuary.  Finding a phone book, I found their number and called.  When the mortuary answered, I was tongue tied not knowing exactly what to say.  How to tell them someone had died.  Finally, I just said, “We had just found Granddad’s body.”  Of course, the mortuary knew exactly what was required.  Now we had to wait for them to arrive.  A short time after calling the mortuary, Gomer arrived via the back door.  When he walked into the living room John looked up and said, “Gosh, Toe he’s gone!”  It was then I learned that Gomer’s nickname was Toe, as in “Toe Head”.  Gomer’s hair was totally gray by the time I met him.  I was to learn that as young boy his hair was blond.  Although Grandad Wilhite had passed away before the Labor Day weekend, his death had been recorded as 4 September 1957.  This year on Carson Street was indeed a sad year.

Bev graduated in February, 1958, one semester before me.  Shortly after graduating she was hired by the Los Angeles County Bureau of Public Assistance as a social worker.  This job required her to use our 1950 Ford to check on her “clients”.  Now we needed another car for me to continue my final semester at LBSC.  We bought a used 1949 4 door Ford that I used for trips to school.  A photo of a 1949 Ford is shown in the photo.  This green approximates the color of both our Fords, but they were not as shiny.  Compare this photo with the one above on our wedding day.  The main difference between the cars can be seen in the trunk ornament.  In other words, there was no difference!


19494 Door Ford

While living here, I tutored a BYU engineering student in College Algebra.  His dad paid his tutoring costs so his son would not flunk the class.  The student was obviously not destined for an engineering career and was in the process of changing his major.  I never heard if he passed his final nor remember what new major he had chosen.  Then, during finals week, Uncle Sam presented me with a draft induction notice.  As explained in College Years essay, being drafted totally changed our world and future.  I had been accepted to graduate school at Kansas University in Lawrence, Kansas. We were looking forward to attending KU with fellow student Larry MacNichols and his wife.  Both Larry and I were planning on pursuing a doctorate in Physics.  Our plans were to live in the Married Students facilities.  While it appeared that all appeals of the Draft Notices were failing, we investigated joining either the Army or the Air Force.  Volunteering would mean a longer commitment but being able to choose a military specialty might provide a better situation than being an Infantry “grunt”.  This approach did not work out, because a college degree meant enlisting as an officer.  As such, once the commitment was finished, you had to join the Reserves.  Since I had no desire to join the Reserves, we were resigned to the fact that he US Army would be my new home for the next two years.   Yep, as an Infantry grunt!  Due to this pending situation, Bev wanted to live closer to her folks, which seemed like a good idea.

Living near Bevy’s folks, while I spent two year in the Army, meant moving to the North Long Beach area.  Luckily, we found an apartment on Phillips Street, about a dozen houses from her folks.  This apartment was in a recently constructed building; thus, we were the first occupants of our unit.  A recent photo shows the apartment building, our unit was the second story front apartment.  Best I can remember there were eight or nine units in the building.  Cars were parked in a large, uncovered area behind the building.


Phillips Street Apartment, 2nd Story Front

We moved in here sometime during the summer of 1958, because the draft appeals had failed.  We were awaiting my induction into the Army sometime in September.  This apartment was also a one bedroom unit with a nice kitchen and large dining area.  Overall, this unit was somewhat larger than our unit on Carson Street.  Then to our great surprise, a lifesaving letter came from UCLA.

This letter inquired if I intended to register for the Fall semester.  Luckily, class registration was still open for about a week, so I rushed to UCLA to register.  As a result, I was able to register at UCLA as a Graduate Physics student. Attending UCLA Graduate School allowed me to receive a one year student draft deferment.  Best I can recall, I missed the Army by about two weeks!  UCLA was about a 30 to 35 mile drive, one way.  The 1949 Ford was fine for the short drives around Long Beach, but UCLA was going to be “A Bridge Too Far”.  Although it is possible the ’49 Ford made a couple trips to UCLA, no such memory has surfaced.  However, it is remembered that our cars changed completely shortly after registering at UCLA.  It is my recollection the ’49 Ford was sold, and The Wilhites gave us their 1950 Mercury sedan.  John had inherited Granddad Wilhite’s 1957 Dodge but had kept their 1950 Mercury.  A photo of a 1950 Mercury sedan is shown. below.  The color is correct, but ours was not that shiny!


1950 Mercury Four Door Sedan

About six months after we sold the ’49 Ford, we received a parking ticket on the car.  The ticket was written somewhere in Los Angeles.  Apparently, the people who bought the car had either not registered it and we were still listed as the owners.  We had to file some forms with the DMV claiming the sale of the car.  After filing the forms, we received no additional tickets on the vehicle.  My best recollection is that some time before receiving this ticket we decided the 1950 Ford needed to be replaced.  This Ford was eight years old, with close to 100,000 miles, which was high mileage at the time.  Either that or we were lusting for a new car, I’m just not sure which it happened to be.  At this time, new American made cars were selling for about $5,000 to $7,000, which was out of our price range.  For some reason, we were not considering a used car of any sort.  Based on my experience with the ’41 Ford Coupe, I did not trust my ability to select one that would be trouble free.  Foreign made cars were not too popular yet, most of those available were expensive sports cars.  I had lusted for an Austin Healy, but even a used one was over $3,000, and was not practical for us.  A very popular foreign car was the VW Beetle.  A new VW Beetle cost about $3, 000, which also was out of price range.  It was out of our price range because of our money philosophy.

Our money philosophy was straight forward and simple; we paid cash for whatever we bought.  Perhaps it was the way we were raised, perhaps it was our budgeting method to avoid debt or perhaps it was common practice of society in general.  Bev and I believed that not having debt was a positive virtue, not a negative one.  We were raised by parents that survived the Great Depression, which had great impact on their financial life.  Whatever our rationale, we began considering the Renault Dauphine.  The car cost about $2,000, which fit our budget.  Plus, the Dauphine’s performance was comparable to the VW.  Both vehicles had rear mounted engines; the VW engine was air cooled, while the Renault engine was water cooled.  In the fall of 1958 we used the ’50 Ford as a trade-in, we bought a 1959 Renault Dauphine from a Long Beach Chrysler dealer.  The car had a manual transmission with three forward gears and a reverse gear.  The gear shift was on the floor, just like the foreign sports cars.  This was our first car with a floor mounted gear shift, but the shift pattern was a standard “H” pattern, just like the steering column mounted shifts on the Fords and Mercury.  The interior was sparse with two bucket seats in front and a rear beach seat.  While there was a heater, I do remember if there was a radio.   The trunk was at the front of the car, and the entire front panel tilted forward when released. A 1959 Renault Dauphine is shown in the following photo.  Our Dauphine was light gray, not a pale yellow with white wall tires.


1959 Renault Dauphine

The Dauphine had a “mighty” 32 HP “4 banger” engine.  I always referred to this engine as a “Sewing Machine” motor, because of its small size and low horsepower rating.  Gas mileage was very good, about 30 MPG, due to its small engine and low vehicle weight.  Top speed was limited, I believe to about 85 MPH.  A phot of this “Sewing Machine: motor is shown in the photo below.  The radiator can be seen at the top of the photo.  The heater blower can be seen to the right of the engine. 


Renault Dauphine 32 HP “Sewing Machine” Engine

Driving the Dauphine was enjoyable, it was responsive despite its small engine.  Bev adapted to the shifting change and used the car for her Public Assistance job.  However, her adaptation to the new car had a hiccup.  On a day I did not have classes at UCLA, Bev called during the afternoon.  Surprised at her call, I was glad to hear from her.  Her news was not good!  She had a wreck with our new car!  A car in front of her stopped suddenly, she reacted quickly and hit the clutch pedal instead of the brake pedal.  She rear ended the car in front of her.  Thankfully, neither Bev nor anyone else were injured.  Perhaps the reason for no injuries was the fact that crash smashed the “trunk” of the Dauphine.  The collapsing empty “trunk” absorbed all the shock of the crash.  Bev’s reactions were based on greater separation between bake and clutch pedals in our other cars.  Yep, driving a smaller car needs more adaption than one might think.  Next, we discovered foreign cars in the late 1950s presented problems that American cars did not suffer

Our car was towed to an auto shop located at a used car lot.  How this auto shop was chosen is not known.  Perhaps, we should have expected there would be trouble ahead.  The auto shop was located on American Boulevard in downtown Long Beach.  We were given a rental car to use while our car was in the repair shop.  Bev would use this car for her job, while the Mercury continued making round trips to UCLA.  Initial estimates were that the repair would require about three weeks.  This estimate stretched about another two weeks, supposedly due to the difficulty of obtaining parts.  Larry Long was our contact at the shop.  Our guess was that Larry was the auto shop manager, but he acted more like a used car salesman.  Every time we stopped in to check about when our car would be ready, it was always the same story about no parts yet.  To topo things off, Larry Long looked like the identical twin of Claude Akins, a movie and TV star.  Larry’s facial appearance was so close to Akins, he would have made a perfect movie double.  Just being in the presence of Larry seemed weird.  Akins’ usual role was always as the villain.  To us, Larry took on the role of villain when our car’s repair continued to be delayed.  Finally, the necessary parts arrived, repair was completed and our car was ready.  Bev continued to use the Renault for her job at the Bureau of Public Assistance.

At the time of the accident, Bev had been working as a Social Worker for about six or eight months.  Her case load had steadily increased to near 25 “clients”, i.e. welfare recipients.  Most, if not all, her cases involved “single” black women with children (sound familiar?).  To receive welfare benefits, there could be no man in the house.  If a there was a man present, he had to have a job.  Duties of her job were to visit these women to assess the family’s need.  These visits were unscheduled and without prior notice and conducted about every month.  Bev noticed that when she knocked at the front door, a man usually exited the back door.  After these visits, she had to prepare a report for the client’s file.  Bev was the most efficient social worker in her unit, which resulted in her being assigned more cases.  In fact, she was assigned the most difficult, or hardest cases.  There was a black woman social worker in her unit, who constantly complained about being assigned another case claiming discrimination, because she was black!  While Bev was “taking care of business” at the Bureau of Public Assistance, I was battling LA traffic and attending classes at UCLA.

Driving to UCLA required traveling the freeways and surface streets.  After leaving our apartment I drove to the Long Beach Freeway, merged on to the Santa Ana Freeway, merged to the Hollywood Freeway and exited on Vine Avenue.  Driving on vine Avenue through Hollywood to Sherman Oaks, then through the residential neighborhood around UCLA.  This drive consumed over two hours in the morning, and about an hour and a half in the reverse direction.  This drive was always in either heavy or moderate traffic, never in light traffic.  Parking was on residential streets in affluent neighborhoods around UCLA.  Walking to the campus was usually three to four blocks.  Residential parking was free and campus parking permits were too expensive.  All classes were in the Physics Building for the first semester.

When a quiet place to study between classes could not be found, I returned to the car between classes.  Each class was full, with class size about 40 or 50 students.  Some classes were taught by a Teaching Assistant, not a Professor.  This situation was totally different than my experience at LBSC, with class sizes normally less than 15 students.  Plus, at LBSC you could see a Professor during his office hours.  In my situation, driving for hours, not knowing anyone, graduate school was not conducive to good study habits.  In some respects, going to UCLA was a repeat of my first years attending a new school every year.  I was experiencing failure, something foreign to me.  A “B” grade point average was not maintained and dropping from graduated school was the only option.  Knowing that the student draft deferment was only valid for two semesters also weighed on my mind.  Even if the grade average were achieved, the draft still loomed.  In fact, had the grade point average been maintained, it is unclear if further appeals were possible.  With the Spring semester rapidly coming to a close, I prepared a resume for an upcoming job search.

Although I had a Leave of Absence from Douglas, returning to the Power Plant Unit did not coincide with my education or interests.  An application was submitted to North American Aviation (NAA) located in Downey.  NAA personnel contacted me for an interview, which was accepted.  My interview was conducted by Floyd Knowlden, a supervisor of an Avionics Unit.  The interview was for an Antenna Group within his Avionics Group.  The interview must have gone well, because about a week later, an offer was received.  The offer was as a Member of the Technical Staff (MTS I) in the Antenna Group for a salary of $580/month.  Bev and I discussed the offer, which seemed reasonable.  In addition, I talked with my friend from LBCC and LBSC, Don McGuire.  Don also agreed it was a reasonable offer.  After further discussion with Bev, the offer was accepted.  I began work at NAA before the summer was over, and received another surprise.  This job was in the defense industry, and as a consequence, a 2A draft deferment was obtained.  This deferment placed me further down the list from those being drafted.  By New Year’s another deferment was obtained.

About mid-January, we discovered Bev was pregnant with our first child.  Bev went to the obstetrician who had delivered her 24 years earlier.  By March, Bev was threatening to miscarry.  At this point, the doctor recommended she take time off and rest.  Perhaps, the doctor recommended bed rest, it is just not clear.  In any event, Bev quit her job at the Bureau of Public Assistance.  Whether she had bed rest, or not, we believed quitting her job saved the pregnancy.  Expecting our first child, the apartment began to seem awfully small.  Since we both had been working for over six months, we had saved enough to consider buying a house.  I do not remember how many houses we looked at, but we found one in our price range in the Lakewood area.  Our offer was accepted and escrow closed in April.  Now we could move into the house by the first part of May.

The previous owners had moved out, so the house was empty.  Before we officially moved occupied the house, Bev and John painted some rooms.  It is my recollection, they painted the kitchen area and I’m not sure what else.   Our house was located at 4832 Premiere Avenue in the city of Lakewood.  The house was close to Lakewood Junior High School, where I had attended.  A recent photo of our first house is shown below.

 4832 Premiere Avenue, Lakewood California

Our house had two bedrooms, a combined living/dining room a kitchen with a breakfast area, one bathroom and a laundry room.  There was a large, fenced backyard and a covered patio.  The patio was nearly the full width of the house.  The living room fireplace was operable.  The front yard did not have a fence and the brick walkway has been added.  It is unclear whether there was a roof over the front porch, but one is not remembered.  We lived in this house for two years before purchasing another house and moving to Anaheim.  Unfortunately, this essay has become too lengthy to adequately describe even our two years here.  Our life after moving into this house and beyond, must await a future essay.  Looking back and reflecting on this period of our life, there are two important observations that need to be noted.

With 20/20 hindsight, we took serious risks with our future!  Deciding to marry during the middle of our college education was not a wise decision.  We had no idea that marriage and obtaining a college education were way beyond our means.  We essentially were broke, Bev had $100 in the bank.   I was broke and my job barely covered our $50/moth rent.  We did not eat well.  Yep, we were living paycheck to paycheck.   I was not earning enough for both of us to complete our education. Certainly, a pregnancy would jeopardize everything.  We lacked clear planning about what college to attend.  I had no plan of action if I failed an exam to attend the Engineering School at the University of California, Berkeley.  Yet, despite all these self-imposed hurdles, we overcame everything.  Yes, we persevered, but Divine Providence was very helpful.  Granddad Graham’s life insurance and just missing being drafted provided an unexpected safety net that allowed us to prevail.  Of course, we never doubted ourselves, actually believing we could not fail.  Either that or we were too oblivious to reality!  Finally, writing this essay has been a real struggle.


Recounting this portion of my life, memory has been a major stumbling block.  Struggling with my memory preparing prior essays has not presented any real problem.  Previously, so many experiences were easily recalled and included my thoughts, feelings and the impacts on my life.  After re-telling how Bev and I met, hours were taken trying to recall what followed our blind date.  Yes, a few experiences have been recalled, but even those memories were deeply buried.  Even so, considerable time and thought were necessary to extract these memories.  Memories recalled for prior essays were so close to the surface, recounting them seemed as though it happened yesterday.  Blanks were drawn attempting to remember why I was attracted to Bev, not being able to define when love bloomed or why marriage became a reality, to name only a few.  Why memories of an important part of my life could not be found, or did not exist, really concerned me.  One plausible reason is that pinpointing such events and feelings could not be recognized, because there was no “bolt of lightning” to infuse it into memory.  Of course, when relationships slowly develop, “when and why” just occur and are not necessarily noted.  Or, maybe these memories have been psychologically suppressed for some reason. Is there some subconscious reason, or is it just a natural degradation of memory (i.e., aging)?  At this point, I am not sure and only time will tell.